A Little Bit About Me, even if you didn't want to know...
I like the color orange. I really like D.J. I miss showing my horse. I hate green beans. I can’t spell really easy words. I don't like chocolate, I live for mountain dew, I like boys with curly hair, I hate wearing shoes, I'm obsessed with brushing my teeth, I don't like the new herbal essence shampoo, I love taking pictures, I hate car rides with other people, but I love to drive. I have an abnormal fear of bananas. I don't think you know me. I like updating my myspace and facebook pages with nonsense. I wish I could spend the rest of my life on a mission trip. I write letters I never intend to send. Sometimes I cry for no reason. I love the city. I feel helpless to help other people. I wish on shooting stars. I remember my old friends and miss them always. I can't talk quick enough for the thoughts in my head, and sometimes mess up the order of my sentences. Dancing around in the living room to loud music is a mandatory Sunday event. I hate to shower. I couldn't live without my dog. I’m sorry. I stare at the IT guy at work and it makes him nervous, I like to dance, even if I dance badly. I don' t like drama. I do love Eric. I say things I don’t mean. I wanted to be a ballerina when I was little, but I fall too easily. I'm a good driver. I hope they fix my dad. I think I'm a bad friend. I'm picky when it comes to certain things. I dance in the car even if people are watching. I'm terrified of people I love dieing, but I'm not afraid of my own death. I like to make people laugh. I should have stayed in vet school. I hate my smile. I love ice pops, and eat them all year round. I love people who understand comfortable silence. I always re-name people, places and things. I worry about the future, and regret a lot of the past, but I love the present. That’s about it. Smile.
"this is good walking music..."
So the Late Night Lushes weekly meetings haven't been so weekly lately, and this is starting to bother me, well not really because, I'm pretty much an All Day Lush. That's life. I've been sitting here at work trying to think of something to write, some good story to tell, some weird happening in my life that would somehow bring joy and laughter to yours, unfortunatly I can think of nothing of importance to share with the general public.
I've come to the conclusion that my start button is broken, and may be beyond repair. I think of these really great things that I want to do, and somehow I never manage to do any of them. I also think I need to create some life goals, other than my "Five Year Plan" (someone else has a five year plan, and I love him, back to the topic). However this five year plan is becoming the 2 year plan, because the five years are flying by. This is a problem. Not because I don't want to follow through with the five year plan, I just had all these hopes and ambitions that I wouldn't have to put the five year plan into effect at least for ten to fifteen. Oh lord.
So I just kind of 'get by' and while that's working for now, it's not where I want to be. I look around, and think to myself where did I go wrong? Seriously, I started off on the right track, Pre-vet, good school, great friends... and then it's like fast forward, and I'm a lump on a long, with a crap degree ( I say 'crap' in the most desirable way, I mean I did spend an enormous amount of time and energy obtaining this degree, interior architecture is a tuff field, if you're mildly retarded, not that there's anything wrong with that).
Sigh.
Where's my life coach?!
Read it: Idiot Girls Action Adventure Club, this is like snort laugh out loud funny. Seriosly. Read it. twice.
Hear it: Ryan Adams: To Be Young "Oh one day when you’re looking back, You were young and man you were sad, when you’re young you get sad, when you're young you get sad, then you get high...you get high."
So the Late Night Lushes weekly meetings haven't been so weekly lately, and this is starting to bother me, well not really because, I'm pretty much an All Day Lush. That's life. I've been sitting here at work trying to think of something to write, some good story to tell, some weird happening in my life that would somehow bring joy and laughter to yours, unfortunatly I can think of nothing of importance to share with the general public.
I've come to the conclusion that my start button is broken, and may be beyond repair. I think of these really great things that I want to do, and somehow I never manage to do any of them. I also think I need to create some life goals, other than my "Five Year Plan" (someone else has a five year plan, and I love him, back to the topic). However this five year plan is becoming the 2 year plan, because the five years are flying by. This is a problem. Not because I don't want to follow through with the five year plan, I just had all these hopes and ambitions that I wouldn't have to put the five year plan into effect at least for ten to fifteen. Oh lord.
So I just kind of 'get by' and while that's working for now, it's not where I want to be. I look around, and think to myself where did I go wrong? Seriously, I started off on the right track, Pre-vet, good school, great friends... and then it's like fast forward, and I'm a lump on a long, with a crap degree ( I say 'crap' in the most desirable way, I mean I did spend an enormous amount of time and energy obtaining this degree, interior architecture is a tuff field, if you're mildly retarded, not that there's anything wrong with that).
Sigh.
Where's my life coach?!
Read it: Idiot Girls Action Adventure Club, this is like snort laugh out loud funny. Seriosly. Read it. twice.
Hear it: Ryan Adams: To Be Young "Oh one day when you’re looking back, You were young and man you were sad, when you’re young you get sad, when you're young you get sad, then you get high...you get high."
Been Thinking A Lot Lately...
about a certain someone... oh boy, it's sad how much I want you. It's that simple. If only...
Okay, cold shower, on with things, so I think I'm going to have to venture back to the dentists chair again soon. Not that I want to, because I don't. I really don't. Honestly. Why? You ask, seriously concerned about the well being of my dental structure. That 'cavity' that I had filled a couple of months ago, I still maintain that it was not a cavity but a dentistry accident that transpired into an anomely that visually resembles that of a cavity. I can rightfully state this because NEVER have I ever, (that's also a good drinking game) had a cavity, and only now after having my wisdom teeth ripped from my tender gums did one appear. Coincidence? I think not. So anyway, the gigantic filling they assembled in my slightly smaller than average mouth caused some mild discomfort after the procedure, but all is fair in fillings and teeth cleaning, right? WRONG! So not only is the filling out of alignment, and oversized, but I'm now slightly paranoid that this cavity creating disease that has entered into my mouth will spread to my other preciously perfect teeth and fester into a large unstoppable plague that will eventually cause all of my pearly whites to decay and fall out of my mouth one by one, leaving me nothing left to eat but pudding and yogurt. Which are two tasty treats that I do enjoy, just in moderation. I'm worried.
In other knews, this is the second post in a not so long span of time, I'm amazed at my self . Really I am.
I've been looking at apartments again... I know, I know you're like WHAT?! you just moved, what's with the apartment hunting mel c? Well, let me just explain, I'm looking for apartments in the ever so windy city to the west, and I'm pretty much happy with what I'm finding... now only one complication, funds. Funds to back up the project, and my meal ticket? Unfortunatly a four legged creature that ate her way into my heart, and I waited 11, yes that's right 11, years to get. Can I get a "my life sucks"....
Oh and just for future record a list of every job I've ever had, minus the 35billion babysitting jobs I've had...
-Busser/Hostess - JPatricks @ Holiday Inn FQ
-Hostess/Server - Bob Evans Pburg
-Office Worker - MD
-Day Care Worker (for dogs) - Pups n'People
-Mail Room Worker/Copy Chick (as Chip put it) - LEC
-Sales Associate - Eddie Bauer
-Cashier - Pet Supplies Plus
-Certified Custom Framing Specialist - Michaels Arts n' Crafts
-Interior Designer (now we're getting somewhere) - AI
-Server - Max & Erma's
-Still Working @ MD
-Barn Worker - GCF
-Riding Instructor- Camp Lochearn in VT
-Sales Associate - Linen's N' Things
-Information Specialist - AANWO
-Riding Instructor - GCF
I get around...
hanging out with the tin man
Okay, cold shower, on with things, so I think I'm going to have to venture back to the dentists chair again soon. Not that I want to, because I don't. I really don't. Honestly. Why? You ask, seriously concerned about the well being of my dental structure. That 'cavity' that I had filled a couple of months ago, I still maintain that it was not a cavity but a dentistry accident that transpired into an anomely that visually resembles that of a cavity. I can rightfully state this because NEVER have I ever, (that's also a good drinking game) had a cavity, and only now after having my wisdom teeth ripped from my tender gums did one appear. Coincidence? I think not. So anyway, the gigantic filling they assembled in my slightly smaller than average mouth caused some mild discomfort after the procedure, but all is fair in fillings and teeth cleaning, right? WRONG! So not only is the filling out of alignment, and oversized, but I'm now slightly paranoid that this cavity creating disease that has entered into my mouth will spread to my other preciously perfect teeth and fester into a large unstoppable plague that will eventually cause all of my pearly whites to decay and fall out of my mouth one by one, leaving me nothing left to eat but pudding and yogurt. Which are two tasty treats that I do enjoy, just in moderation. I'm worried.
In other knews, this is the second post in a not so long span of time, I'm amazed at my self . Really I am.
I've been looking at apartments again... I know, I know you're like WHAT?! you just moved, what's with the apartment hunting mel c? Well, let me just explain, I'm looking for apartments in the ever so windy city to the west, and I'm pretty much happy with what I'm finding... now only one complication, funds. Funds to back up the project, and my meal ticket? Unfortunatly a four legged creature that ate her way into my heart, and I waited 11, yes that's right 11, years to get. Can I get a "my life sucks"....
Oh and just for future record a list of every job I've ever had, minus the 35billion babysitting jobs I've had...
-Busser/Hostess - JPatricks @ Holiday Inn FQ
-Hostess/Server - Bob Evans Pburg
-Office Worker - MD
-Day Care Worker (for dogs) - Pups n'People
-Mail Room Worker/Copy Chick (as Chip put it) - LEC
-Sales Associate - Eddie Bauer
-Cashier - Pet Supplies Plus
-Certified Custom Framing Specialist - Michaels Arts n' Crafts
-Interior Designer (now we're getting somewhere) - AI
-Server - Max & Erma's
-Still Working @ MD
-Barn Worker - GCF
-Riding Instructor- Camp Lochearn in VT
-Sales Associate - Linen's N' Things
-Information Specialist - AANWO
-Riding Instructor - GCF
I get around...
hanging out with the tin man
I really think that everyone should have watercolors, magnetic poetry, and a harmonica.
Are you ready for this my melancholy friend? Sure you are. So what's with the sudden interest in my life lately? 3 months go by, and nothing, not so much as a soft wind coming my way with your name on it, and suddenly all this commotion and motion causing my life to screech to a freakish halt. First the phone call, and the message left by her, not so cool. Not so cool at all. Then the follow up call, just to patch that first one up, followed by her email, cold and casual as expected. And my response to your inquisition? How's the erie silence treating you?
There's only one problem with this situation, I'm secretly screaming to respond, to get it all out, to yell, and and get you to yell back. Only I know that's not how it would go, not really. I'd stay calm, let you talk, we'd speak in generalities checking the waters, and then if all seemed right we'd creep away from the safe harbor and ask some detailed questions hoping for the answers we secretly want, and then cringe if the harsh wind blows our way. It's hard thinking that we had so much, and lost it in a 4 paragraph email to someone who wasn't even you. But that's life. I'm droning on about something that doesn't really matter, the likelihood of us seeing each other again, slim to none, the likelihood of going to back to the way things were anyway even slimmer. But currently it consumes me.
Song to Download: Butch Walker... Best Thing You Never Had ...well my heart got shattered like romantic road kill my ego got splattered and your ego got fatter and I hope that you're flattered...hello how you doing, what's it like to ruin all my self esteem? when you blow off some steam... so why am i jadded to get back at you what makes it cool when you act like nothing ever happened I feel like I should feel better but I care like someone who thought they're the only one that mattered I hope that you're battered, cause you broke this dam, the best thing that you never had.
Are you ready for this my melancholy friend? Sure you are. So what's with the sudden interest in my life lately? 3 months go by, and nothing, not so much as a soft wind coming my way with your name on it, and suddenly all this commotion and motion causing my life to screech to a freakish halt. First the phone call, and the message left by her, not so cool. Not so cool at all. Then the follow up call, just to patch that first one up, followed by her email, cold and casual as expected. And my response to your inquisition? How's the erie silence treating you?
There's only one problem with this situation, I'm secretly screaming to respond, to get it all out, to yell, and and get you to yell back. Only I know that's not how it would go, not really. I'd stay calm, let you talk, we'd speak in generalities checking the waters, and then if all seemed right we'd creep away from the safe harbor and ask some detailed questions hoping for the answers we secretly want, and then cringe if the harsh wind blows our way. It's hard thinking that we had so much, and lost it in a 4 paragraph email to someone who wasn't even you. But that's life. I'm droning on about something that doesn't really matter, the likelihood of us seeing each other again, slim to none, the likelihood of going to back to the way things were anyway even slimmer. But currently it consumes me.
Song to Download: Butch Walker... Best Thing You Never Had ...well my heart got shattered like romantic road kill my ego got splattered and your ego got fatter and I hope that you're flattered...hello how you doing, what's it like to ruin all my self esteem? when you blow off some steam... so why am i jadded to get back at you what makes it cool when you act like nothing ever happened I feel like I should feel better but I care like someone who thought they're the only one that mattered I hope that you're battered, cause you broke this dam, the best thing that you never had.
Wondering what to do...maybe I'll pick up the phone.
So I finally figured out what was going on with my lil blog site, and why it wasn't looking the way i had remembered it to look back in the day. I don't know why, or how but at some point the template I used is no longer active, or I destroyed it. I'm not sure which, though the latter is the more likely choice. But oh well. I spent about half an hour trying to pick a new template that would look semi worthy of my space, I know that's crazy, and I know that it just helps show the coolness level that i currently resonate at. Such is life. I've decided, with the help of my spiritual guide "Mr. Moon" that I need a vacation, not that I have done anything worthy of earning a vacation, I just whole heartedly believe that I need on. You're probably thinking wasn't your entire summer a vacation? And to that my friend I reply, no, hell no. If anything it was a stress test gone very very bad. I passed, not just because of my superior skills, I just happen to test well.
So my dear friend, bedee, sent this thing via email to me, and I'm not one to read forwards, and definitely not one to read entire forwards, but I was feeling like I had a bit of free time last night and decided I could splurge a few extra minutes and read it. And I will post my own reply, on here, I think it deserves one. It's basically the male point of view of us gallons of milk (aka women) and why we go bad. Fired up yet? Don't worry we don't all go bad, just the majority of us. I'm sure i'm going to get a nasty email about how I'm not finding the deeper meaning to this piece of journalistic art, and to that I say, well I am only a gallon of milk, most likely spoiled, sitting in the cooler at the grocery store, and I'm most likely overpriced to say the least. Metaphors are for monkeys. Not really I just needed to say that. The music I'm listening to right now is so relaxing I could totally fall back asleep. Only I have to work today, and so sleeping right before I go would not be a happy thing,because then all I'd want to think about at work is sleeping, and it's starting already, so i have to stop thinking about sleep and just get on with it.
So I will. On with it now.
Peace in the east, my fellow milk jugs.
If you get a chance to read read this:
So you say you want to get a natural high?
other natural highs available:
Long time no blog. But that's life. So who wants to hear about my new years eve? That's right you all do. But I'm going to spare you the details, call if you want them, and give you the condensed readers digest version of the nights happenings. First, lost one and a half (half because shorty couldn't concentrate enough to continue play) games of euchre. Next, got sufficiently buzzed. Then, groped by married boy. And to top the night off, ugly boy's comments that will live forever: 1) I'll give you a natural high, if you know what I mean. 2) (to jaymee) so I'm trying to get in your friends pants but I don't think it's working. HELLO! you're ugly kid, of course it's not going to work. Seriously.
In other news, I'm still no further along on trying to get a life than I was when I was 6, my reading level is the only thing that's actually improved, and the only reason for that is the year or two I spent every saturday at the library. No joke. I know it's hard to believe cool me spend saturday at the library. Reading is sexy people.
I've decided the entire world is crazy. And my pet peeve of the week is the fact that people do not know how to argue, or they just yell. Seriously, you can only argue with someone who is willing to fight, and in case you were wondering I DO NOT CARE enough to fight with you, about anything. Well, that's a lie, I'd fight over dj. For sure. But other than that carry your own shit on your shoulders, I chose not to. You can't make me yell with you so don't bother trying. This is my rant. Not my life. I've wasted enough of my life, and I won't waist anymore of it on you. You're not that worthy. Kiss it.
People I currently miss...scotty b. (ALWAYS!) asia tasia (haven't talked to you in way too long!) kristi smith (you are the coolest puddin pop I know) horton (because you like to dish with me) kendra (because that girl is sweet) there are more I just don't remember them right now!
cool song to download for today: James Blunt / Goodbye My Lover
"And I will reveal my soul in time. When I'm kneeling at your feet. Goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend...I'm so hollow, I'm so hollow baby, I'm so hollow. "
