You + Me = Us .... I know my Calculus

I was on my way home from the barn this morning, and I was driving, and the radio was off (I don't know why) and I just started to think about that fun song. And then it made me want to go to Chi Chi's, and thats pretty sad. Especially since it was 9am. Oh well. So then I wanted to listen to the song, only the CD was at the apartment, and so that was depressing, especially since when I pulled in the parking lot I saw the CD case buried on the floor of my car, I had the CD the entire time. Damn Karma.

Also, I have this wedding to go to tomorrow, and like most things in life I waited until the last minute to buy a dress, because just like prom (both years) I thought I wouldn't have a problem finding one (and just like prom both years) however I couldn't find one, anywhere... so I ordered one, and oh yeah it's too big. So if I had ordered it with time to spare I could you know send it back, oh no, so now I'm stuck with this dress thats too big, that I have to wear. So I'm contimplating trying to shrink it. This could be either a good thing or a bad thing. With my luck I'll end up with a bedee sized dress, or it won't change at all. Oh well. Another problem I have, I am sunburnt like nobodys business. No joke. Last night I was up until 3 because I can't lay on my back or on my side because the heat radiates off of my back and then I feel like I'm in a freaking oven, and that really is not a fun place to be (probably just a little taste of how I'm going to feel when I die and go to hell for all the evil things I've done in my life... damn karma).

So that leaves us with the last topic of the day, away messages... they bother me. They're main job is to tell me what your doing at any one moment in time. Though I'm sure they were intended for people who had to run and answer the phone or were busy looking at porn and didn't want to be bothered, but what do I know?

So, I enjoy funny away messages, like one of my dear friends from grade school who had this one... "there are two kinds of mints you should never refuse in life. Breath mints, and compliments, because either way someone is trying to tell you something"... the general "I'm away from my computer right now" works, a little boring, but I can handle it. I know a few fans of that one.

Also, people who say the same thing... over... and over... and over... and over... day... after day.... after day... PLEASE either just SIGN off and get a life, or just use the general one. Seriously they should police these things, no loitering, or keeping the same away message or same SUBJECT of away message for days on end. (I used to be an offender of keeping the away message the same for days but I've grown out of that stage)

Another thing I hate are away messages that make no sense... you know what I'm talking about. People who are too lazy to think of anything normal, annoy me. Quotes are fun, and always enjoyable. However I do not want to know your daily schedual, including trips to the bathroom, what you ate for every meal that day and how many times you let your dog out. Come on now people.

The real clincher, emoticons (is that what they're calling the assortment of faces these days?) some people do them stylishly, while other people should have that button taken away. I mean seriously. there are some people who use them, and it's like I can actually see that persons head right there on my screen with that same expression on their face, and that quite frankly scares me. Ugh, it gives me the chills just thinking about it... So members of the AIM community, please think of others and use common sense the next time you think about hitting that 'away messsage' button.

Props to horton for updating his blog... Check it out now...

So you want to be a pro-skate boarder?

So I'm visiting relatives this week, and let me just tell you, I am officially addicted to Tony Hawk's play station two game. Not only do I ge to be my best friend Bam Magara BUT I get to choose what he wears, AND I get to skateboard in some pretty awesome places. If only I could even skateboard straight in real life... a girl can dream right?

Besides playing Tony Hawk, (the play station is in the room that I am staying in, so not only do I play most of the day, I play after everyone has gone to bed, I'm leaving tomorrow so I'm trying to get as much playing time in as I can) I went to Kings Island, they (my second family) live like 3 minutes away, you can pretty much see it from their house. So I rode all of these rides, and yeah, it doesn't compare to Cedar Point, but for free (when you've got the connections I have) and you just want to have a fun day with almost NO LINES, it's definatly worth it. The only thing is, I didn't think about this until after I rode like fifty rides, but I have been having back problems for awhile now, (my parents tell me it's the horses, but I'm still not convinced) and it hasn't hurt for awhile now, but after all of those rides, it was pretty evident that I'm an idiot. It felt like someone jabbing a metal stake through my back and then twisting it slowly around by the end of the day. But I was able to suck it up, and made it through the day, only to return home scorched from the sun. Chalk another one up for me. Go Team.

Now, I am sitting here having arrived back at their house, after my cousin's baseball party (I'm one of the family when I'm in town) and I really want to see the movie sea biscuit, like bad. And I know I'm a loser, and thats really okay, because I don't care. I just want to see it. And I don't know why this just came up. But I thought you should all know, because someone should go and see it with me. SOON. But anyway, we're back from this SUPER COOL baseball party, and my one cousin Dan, he's going to be a stud, I can see it now. We were getting ready to leave and ALL of the little girls were like 'bye dan'. And the boy is only in the sixth grade. He just shakes his head, and smiles. Already tired of the cat calls. It makes me sick.

OH but the best news of the ENTIRE visit. The boy I was going to marry, the boy who was the first boy to play 'I'll show you mine, if you show me yours' with me when i was like 8, is engaged. After years of family torture, and nagging about the fact that we were definatly going to get married, and everyone saying we're perfect for each other he's getting married. HOW AWSOME is that?! The kid barely graduated highschool, works at applebees and has no future, and he's perfect for me?! That tells you what my family thinks of me. Poor girl has no idea what she's getting into. I just know it frees me from future years of nagging. And that is great. Actually I'm happy for the kid, He's happy, and I'm extatic. Only thing is we're the only ones who think the wedding is actually going to happen. Damn. Oh well, I just hope they have a long engagement.

"The shell must break before the bird can fly." -- Tennyson

UPDATE!: For all of you wondering about our dear friend jeremy from the previous post, this ones for you, (and you and you) so I had to leave at the point that I ended the post, so I went to work and was telling my dear friend erin about this show, and she was like I've seen that. So I got excited, and asked how it ended. Did our leading man Jeremy get Lashanda to go to the prom with him? Did the annoying girl die from her heart condition that was in her head? I needed to know. I'll save the best for last.

So annoying girl, her life went on, and during awards for seniors I guess she got boo'ed every time she won an award, now thats cohesion amongst a class if I ever saw it. (well at least they were all working together against one girl right?). And then she cried a bit more... boo fucking hoo.

On with the feature presentation... So Jeremy asked this chick Lashanda to prom, and she stuttered as if pondering whether or not to show up at prom with this boy. And then she said 'if my mother allows it'. So I'm thinking this girl is going to turn this kid down, and then show up at prom with the quarter back or something... oh no. So her mom, his mom, and the rest of the family all got together, and her mom was like ok she can go. Turns out Lashanda is a little slow too, so it's a perfect fit! So, Jeremy shows up at Lashanda's house to pick her up and she's all upset because she can't get her hair right, which I don't blame her, she can't be that slow, because the girl knows when she looks good. So he's freaking out and keeps asking his mom, should I go up there? should I just stay here? how cute! So they go to prom, and since you know you pick tables when you get tickets, they had to to sit alone, but they were alright with that. And where does that leave us? They're happily dating! I'm so excited, I should be hospitalized.

That's what I'm doing these days...

So, I'm sitting here, watching TV, and there is this show on MTV, something about senior year of highschool, and seriously this one chick is enough to drive me crazy, she's whining and I want to smack her. So your a senior, and you're trying to decide what school to go to, why does this make you special? why are you on my tv? Seriously.

Ok, so I'm totally ready for school to start. Because lets face it, aside from having to take tests, write papers, do projects, and complete homework, at least you're on a normal schedual. I'm a nerd, I already knew that. But I enjoy having a plan for the week, knowing where I'm going to be, and when. It's an enjoyable thing. However this semesters classes are not looking all that great.

PAUSE! Dude, this show is back on, about the seniors and this kid is talking about senioritis and how it's when you don't come to school you go to frat parties. Frat parties?! In highschool?! And now there is this poor boy on who is a bit slow, but is really smart, he has no social skills, and the poor boy just wants a date to the prom. And he's asking all these people and no one will go with him. I would go with him. I feel bad because he is almost crying. Someone find this boy a date. Please. Ohh, they just showed previews for later on in the show, and it looks like this one chick (who is really, really thinking about it, stuttering and all) might say yes, to our dear friend jeremy, the slow boy. So good luck to him, I hope he gets a date.

A bit too much time on our hands...

And now straight from the 'jr high notes' section of my junk box at my parents house, a little taste of a bored friend...

This is just silly, so enjoy.

Basketball season is over, heat rises off the asphalt in wiggily waves. It's too hot to hoop, looking for something to keep your cardio pump primed? Some summer diversion to maintain your remarkable hand/eye coordination? Gather your over heated teammates together and challenge your roundball rivals to a game of canoe polo.

The game of polo has been around for more than 500 years, canoes even longer. It was only a matter of time before they found each other. With over 75% of the earths surface covered in water there's a lot more canoe polo fields on the planet than basketball courts. Now I know your wondering, how are you going to get that great big horse into a little bitty canoe without tipping over? Well the truth is you don't use horses in Canoe polo, you don't even use canoes.

Canoe polo is played in kayaks. Oh why don't they call it kayak polo? hey I'm a person not an encyclopedia. You're going to need ten kayaks, five for your team, and five for your unsuspecting victims. You'll also need ten doubnle bladed paddles.

No hitting, or splashing with your paddle allowed, that would be a water foul. You'll need a soccer ball, two floating goals, and football helmets work nicely. In addition to the other things, all players must wear buoyancy aids. What arebuoyancy aids? Things that help you float, like life jackets, rubber ducks, hot water bottles, water wings, chubby kid sisters, etc. Once you've got your stuff together, take everything down to a nice calm body of water. Your local swimming hole, the city reservoir, or a very large bucket. If you can't find a big enouhg body of water, use your basement. Just plug up any openings, run a hose down the steps, and crank on the faucet. Then climb into those kayaks and get ready to thrash and splash.

Your mission: To send the soccer ball into your opponent's goal more often than they send it into yours. No stalling allowed. You've got to pass or shoot within five seconds of controlling the ball. official canoe polo matches are composed of twenty minute periods with a three minute half time break. Just enough time to squeegee the water out of your ears with your pinky. So thats it. You've got the basics. Now strap on your kayak, and get ready to dunk.




Someday, I'll share "The game of Skittle" with you... I wish I could remember what drugs we must have been taking at that time.

The harder you fall, the higher you bounce.

Todays title has nothing, not a thing to do with todays post... I just enjoy it.

I'm convinced I have west nile, how did I come to this conclusion? Saturday night I was out, at my wonderful friend Kristi's and I had worn jeans, well boys are evil and I ended up in the pond, and in the interest of comfort the jeans were laid aside and after a round of king of the mountain, and jumping off the dock we retreated back to shore with our fun towel skirts, leaving my calves and ankles open to a mosquito all you can eat buffet. The next afternoon I realize I have almost 15 bites covering my lower extremities, while complaining to my mother about the itching she says we'll have to get some bug repellent for you so you don't get west nile.

It was at that point the visions of those horrifying billboards the state of ohio has put up with the godzilla sized mosquito on it that reads "Mosquitos Can Kill" with a disturbing red background that reminds you of the plague flashed before my eyes. I then began to inquire about the symptoms I was sure I was going to be showing in only a matter of
minutes. My mother refuses to tell me, saying only that even if I were to have it, she figured I was young and could handle it. So when I die, I hope I can handle that too. Since I'm young and all.

And so with that knowledge I do while still being of sound mind and body bequeath all of my worldly possessions to my dog, Libby. She knows what to do.

Oh, but I do expect all of you at my funeral.

Just be happy that you made it this far....

Yesterday, someone I used to be friends with said to me 'you have the absolut worst luck of anyone I know'... and I thought to myself... you know I always thought that, but to have someone else say it, out loud, it must be true. Of course she said this after one of the horses I ride ran me over like a fat kid runs over a skinny kid on his way to the ice cream truck, but still it makes you wonder. There I stood with dirt in my eyes, ears, and mouth pondering the fact that I could, indeed have the worst luck of anyone standing on the planet at that moment. Then it occured to me what did I do to deserve such horrible luck... and then I realized, I'm mean, and mean people are not blessed with good luck, unless they are not truly mean, they just think they are. So now I sit here, trying to come up with ways to cure my meanness, all thats happening, I am thinking of things I need to get done today. I am going to hell... in fact I'm pretty sure I'm going to be on the VIP list... oh well, gotta live it up while I can I suppose...until next time...